Please Don't Eat the Babies

1983 "Dangerous Men. Desperate Women. Deadly Treasure."
3.7| 1h28m| NA| en| More Info
Released: 11 November 1983 Released
Producted By: Mars Production Corporation
Country:
Budget: 0
Revenue: 0
Official Website:
Info

Teenage girls are kidnapped and brought to a remote island, which is inhabited by a family of crazed killers.

Genre

Horror, Action

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Director

Henri Charr

Production Companies

Mars Production Corporation

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Please Don't Eat the Babies Audience Reviews

Stoutor It's not great by any means, but it's a pretty good movie that didn't leave me filled with regret for investing time in it.
BelSports This is a coming of age storyline that you've seen in one form or another for decades. It takes a truly unique voice to make yet another one worth watching.
Janae Milner Easily the biggest piece of Right wing non sense propaganda I ever saw.
Jonah Abbott There's no way I can possibly love it entirely but I just think its ridiculously bad, but enjoyable at the same time.
Woodyanders Several folks find themselves being terrorized on a remote island by a deranged and dangerous family of backwoods cannibal hicks. Sound good? Well, it sure ain't. Man, does this mind-numbing schlockfest strike out something rotten in every possible way: The flat (non)direction by Henri Charr, the painfully plodding pace, the jumbled narrative that awkwardly jumps back and forth in time, the trite, tedious, and talky script by David Golia and John B. Pfiefer, the extremely poor acting from a lame no-name cast, the insipid cardboard characters, the severe death of both suspense and spooky atmosphere, and the crudely rendered graphic gore all make this turkey a truly grueling chore to endure. Luckily, the delectable Kirsten Baker, who played the sexy skinny dipper in "Friday the 13th Part 2," spends all of her screen time in a yummy red bikini that shows off her smoking hot tight body quite nice (and the less said about her underwhelming plywood performance the better). Moreover, wizened veteran character actor Hank Worden injects some much-needed (and appreciated) vigor into the otherwise lifeless proceedings with his enjoyably hammy portrayal of grumpy hillbilly patriarch Gramps Jebediah. But overall this crud proves to be so dull and draggy that it alas can't quality as a good bad time for connoisseurs of craptacular cinema. Absolute claptrap.
Chase_Witherspoon Amateurish account of two young women abducted by thugs after the gold coin worn by one of them is recognised as a rare antiquity. After a lot of threats and intimidation, the girls finally agree to reveal the location of the treasure, recounting in flashback the horrific events they survived as a pair of precocious teenagers when their group was drugged and dismembered by a family of deranged maniacs on a remote island.An earthquake, a bizarre ritualistic castration, random close-ups of cockroaches, a village idiot and a pair of not-so-wholesome old folks with sinister intentions are just a few of the dubious encounters you'll experience in this offbeat thriller. 30's cowboy staple Hank Worden looks frail but delivers his corn-fed dialogue ("I done got him that time granny, now how 'bout some pie") with professionalism, while the only other recognisable face is that of Kirsten Baker ("Friday the 13th Part II") in a frivolous (and topless) supporting role.Low budget props and special effects (e.g. the sponge-dummy "body" lying on the ground in the barn when Todd is attempting his escape) earn a high camp value while a couple of gruesome meat hook / meat cleaver incidents and a gratuitous sex scene up the sadism ratio considerably. Quirky and amateurish, but curiously entertaining nonetheless, the film's legacy of wisdom is a warning to all: don't accept herbal tea from old folks.
HumanoidOfFlesh Sugar and Bobbylee,two teenage girls end up being kidnapped by some criminals led by Sid and taken back to an island that they had visited many years before when they were ten years old.It seems that the island was inhabited by a family of bloodthirsty cannibals including grandpa Jebediah and his wife,a small kid and an older mentally-ill kid.The mayhem told in drawn-out flashbacks ensues...Very muddled and confusing horror flick with a bit of gore and nudity provided by Kirsten Baker of "Friday the 13th Part 2" fame.Fortunately the film is never boring and there is enough cheese for my liking."Please Don't Eat The Babies" sat unreleased for six years after being filmed in 1983.7 out of 10.Watchable piece of trash with bad acting and awful climax.
lazarillo I'm generally pretty indulgent towards these low-budget, shaggy-dog horror movies from the 70's and 80's. After all, it was hard to make movies back then with very limited resources (I'm less indulgent today when any talentless idiot with a digital video camera can easily foist any kind of unwatchable dreck on an unsuspecting public). The problem with this movie is that, not only is not very competently made, but it's not just entertaining on any level(even an unintentional one).The current version of this "Island Fury" is actually TWO lame movies--a wrap-around story which looks to have been shot around the time of the film's 1989 release, and the main story which was filmed earlier in the 80's (1983 I guess). In the frame story two older teenage girls are on vacation in the Far East when they are lured off on a treasure hunt to an island where it turns out they'd been years earlier when they were children with one of the girl's older sister and the sister's teenage/college age friends. This is the main story which involves the group running into a family of kindly old cannibals.The plot is pretty pedestrian. The acting is terrible (having ten-year-old protagonists might be novel if they weren't even worse actresses than your usual teenage horror fodder). Compared to the protagonists the elderly cannibals aren't bad, but as the villains they really needed to be far more compelling. One of the older girls in the main story is played by Kirsten Baker who played a skinny-dipping, extreme short-shorts wearing camp counselor/"Jason" victim in "Friday the 13th Part II". She has a very nice bikini-clad ass. I say this not to be a sexist pig (well, not JUST to be a sexist pig), but because this movie is so frickin' boring I spent all my time staring at it whenever it was on screen (which unfortunately wasn't very much). Baker's bikini-clad tail gives the movie's only really compelling performance (not even Baker herself, she is pretty somnambulistic). Of course, Baker's ass gave an even better (and un-bikini-clad) performance in "Friday the 13th II", and that was a much more entertaining movie to boot. I give the filmmakers an "A" for effort here, but I really hope they kept their day jobs. . .