Mjeteconer
Just perfect...
Fairaher
The film makes a home in your brain and the only cure is to see it again.
Derrick Gibbons
An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.
Candida
It is neither dumb nor smart enough to be fun, and spends way too much time with its boring human characters.
Svend_Sorensen
Honestly, I didn't really watch this movie, since I just happened to stumble across it on IMDb while on my quest to find bad movies. I haven't even read the other reviews yet either, but I'm pretty sure they're stellar as well. They say you shouldn't judge a book by its cover but whoever said that forgot to mention movies, especially crappy mock-busters like this one, which are ripe for the picking. In this case, the cover pretty much does all the talking for whatever the hell this is supposed to be. Though I may not be an expert on the matter, I have a revolutionary inkling that Captain Battle is trying to rip off Captain America while simultaneously looking sinister enough to be disguised as a porno. Incredible, I know. Detective Svend is on the case again, people! I'm high as **** & you know what that means! Sh!tty movie time! OK well this reviews pretty much over. I think I've said all that needs to be said. In all actuality I'm hoping that it's going to be so laughable that it's enjoyable, versus being just boringly bad or boringly mediocre.
Evil-Lee-666
After watching this Movie 5 times in a weekend (my buddy & I told friends it was the best movie ever made, a must see) I am still undecided as to the actual agenda of this movie. Is it......Option 1: Its a tribute to every bad movie ever made using every bad camera shot, bad effects, really bad editing & some seriously depressing acting (if this is the case then its Genius) Option 2: Its simply the worst movie ever made period (if this is the case then someone needs shooting or stopped from having any offspring for the sake of Humanity in general) As for the storyline......well its a Captain America rip off almost from start to end.It was funny the first time I watched it & the fun aspect shrunk with every viewing to the point where suicide was a viable option. Its fairly obvious that they blew the entire budget on the Car & the Chicks with nothing left for the effects or editing. I am lost for words as to how I express my level of pity towards this movie.
Cassandra Kelsey
Nazis, strippers, actors who look like they should be in porn, bargain basement special effects, dodgy costumes and really silly music= Captain BattleSam Battle has a had a bit of a hard time in Iraq, he has a horrible injury and his good pal Dr Storm injects him with BS serum. He falls into a coma and goes home to the US of A where he recovers miraculously. Next he learns that Nazis are taking over his town and the shenanigans begin in earnest. Evil skinheads run amok under the command of their buxom MILF commander who minces around in fetish gear barking orders with a voice only slightly less annoying than Kim Kardashian's. Some sort of plot is attempted next! Nazi MILF wants to get her monkey paws on the BS serum and abducts Dr Storm (dun dun DUUUN!) Sam Battle now must discover his family legacy and save the day. I like to think that this movie has some redeeming features, because I spent a couple of hours of my life on it so I will try to be as merciful as I can. It is fairly funny, if you are in the right sort of mood for watching something with production values which are completely dire. The script is awful, the acting is awful and that can have it's own charm if you happen to be off your face or something. Let's face it nobody wants to watch Schindler's List when they are inebriated, with that in mind it could be a great movie to watch after crawling home from the pub or if you happen to be a stoner. I gave it 3 out of 10 because it could be funny under the right circumstances and there was at least an attempt at a story. Watch it sober at your own risk though, you have been warned.
martin-foerner
SFX: -4 Soundtrack: 0 Actors: 2 Camera: 0 (the first scenes already show 50% grass-close-ups) Men's Outfits: 3 Women's Outfits: 6 (tits yay, but srsly porno Nazi queen?) Plot: 3 (They revive Himmler and he has a red face!?! And then they want to revive Hitler) requisites: -2 (plastic guns, Nazis drive Honda Element) ending: N/A (the movie just stops instead of a showdown)Overall I would say it was a waste of time to watch this piece of crap--- I wouldn't even call it movie because it misses significant characteristics of movies (for example an ending). The best part is the scene in the strip club, which isn't good but still worse than other movies. And why the hell does he have an eye patch? He doesn't even have any superpowers...? Even the normal Nazis beat the crap out of him... yes, those with swastikas-"tattoos" painted on their skin with Edding.
