Lovesusti The Worst Film Ever

InformationRap This is one of the few movies I've ever seen where the whole audience broke into spontaneous, loud applause a third of the way in.

AshUnow This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.

Lidia Draper Great example of an old-fashioned, pure-at-heart escapist event movie that doesn't pretend to be anything that it's not and has boat loads of fun being its own ludicrous self.

Scott LeBrun "Mermaids of Tiburon" has a wonderful, otherworldly quality about it, thanks to the efforts of writer / director John Lamb, who's best known as a top notch underwater photographer. It has a sedate pace, not much of a story, and not a whole lot of action, so it won't be for all tastes, but cult movie lovers who love the surreal are sure to find it quite engaging. Given Lambs' background, it's not surprising that the visuals are so strong. The underwater scenes in this thing are just gorgeous - and, naturally, the women are all gorgeous too. It may take a viewer out of the story to some degree seeing that not all of the mermaids have fins, but the film remains a interesting and erotic experience.George Rowe, in his only acting gig, plays Samuel Jamison, a marine biologist with Marineland who accepts a gig offered to him by elderly gentleman Ernst Steinhauer (John Mylong of "Robot Monster"): travel to the waters around Tiburon, an island off the coast of Mexico, in search of pearls. Well, George finds something else entirely: a grouping of exquisite mermaids who fascinate him. The real world also intrudes harshly, as a greedy fellow pearl hunter, Milo Sangster (played by the legendary screen psycho Timothy Carey) shows up using unscrupulous methods in the search for treasure.Not a lot may happen in "Mermaids of Tiburon", yet it just pulls a viewer right in with its ambiance, enhanced by a beautiful music score courtesy of Richard LaSalle. Rowe never speaks on camera; instead his dialogue is entirely expressed in voice over narration. He does a decent job, and Carey is great malevolent fun as one could expect. The physical charms of the mermaid performers are impossible to resist, with Playboy Playmate Diane Webber (who would again play a mermaid on an episode of the series 'Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea') and Gaby Martone placed front and centre.This has an agreeable midnight movie feel to it at all times, and it's sure to appeal to lovers of obscure B pictures. Clocking in at a mere 77 minutes, it's always watchable.Seven out of 10.

kevin olzak 1961's "The Mermaids of Tiburon" aired on Pittsburgh's Chiller Theater on Sept 5 1964 (the final 4:00 PM broadcast, the Sunday night co-feature being 1931's "Svengali"), and no doubt was shown in black and white. Today available on a DVD double bill with 1957's "Cry of the Bewitched" (both in glorious color) in the original fullscreen version, and the later letterboxed version, featuring new footage of topless models acting like mermaids. It's nice to have the 'nude' version, but the star of the original, the luminous Diane Webber, is almost completely cut out, and the story arc revolves around our hero's innocent pursuit of this untouchable goddess of the sea (there are glimpses of other mermaids but Diane reigns supreme). All of the topless models are missing the fins worn by the originals, looking like normal women out for some vigorous underwater exercise. Director John Lamb's photography brings this world to life, even including a scene with Diane swimming alongside a (possibly fake) shark. Timothy Carey's gratuitous villain spearguns a topless mermaid, and strips another of her lone seaweed garment, neither of which appear in the original. His intrusive presence disrupts the film's charming narrative, which is left unresolved as the hero vows to return someday. Until a better mermaid film comes along, this one manages to enter their world better than any other. Diane Webber would again don the fiberglass fin for a 1967 episode of VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA (after Marta Kristen got her shot in 1965's "Beach Blanket Bingo").

Woodyanders Young marine biologist Dr. Samuel Jamison (a likable performance by director George Rowe in his only acting gig) discovers a bunch of lovely and enticing lady mermaids while searching for buried treasure located deep in the ocean nearby an isolated Mexican island. Writer/director John Lamb gives this simple tale a certain sweet and strangely innocent charm. Moreover, Lamb also maintains a steady pace throughout and brings a sense of genuine awe to the fantastic subject matter. The actresses who portray the titular topless sea sirens are quite attractive and well-endowed; Diane Webber and Gaby Martone in particular are totally ravishing. Popping up in cool supporting roles are the singular Timothy Carey as nasty no-count criminal creep Milo Sangster, Jose Gonzales-Gonzales as excitable Mexican fisherman Pepe Gallardo, and John Mylong as weird old gent Ernst Steinhauer. Lamb's beautiful bright color cinematography offers a wondrous wealth of stunning visuals (the underwater photography is often very striking). Richard La Selle's lush, stirring orchestral likewise hits the melodic spot. An enjoyable little flick.

kirksworks There have only been a handful of good live action movies with a mermaid as a central character. The black and white "Miranda" and its color sequel "Mad About Men," British films starring Glynnis Johns, are recommended, but only recently have become available on DVD or streaming. The best of the older American bunch, however, is "Mr. Peabody and the Mermaid" from 1948. William Powell plays a man going through an old age crisis who catches mermaid Ann Blythe on a fishing trip. It's a bit dated, but still quite appealing. "Night Tide" (with Dennis Hopper) is a more nightmarish take on the idea, and "Splash" with Darryl Hannah and Tom Hanks is a more humorous take. More recently "Aquamarine" successfully reinvented the myth for a younger female audience, and it's probably the most successful mermaid story other than "Peabody." I even prefer it to "Splash." What all these movies have in common, however, is that they find ways to keep the story on dry land. What distinguishes "Mermaids of Tiburon" is that it takes place mostly in the ocean, and often underwater. It was directed and photographed by John Lamb, who clearly knew how to shoot underwater scenes. And although it was low budget, the choice of location and clever imagery give it a bit more polish. Of course the infamous Tim Carey as the bad guy doesn't hurt, but considering his wonderfully characteristic voice, he could have used more dialog. Diane Webber was pretty impressive, however. She must have been quite a good swimmer. In most, if not all of the underwater scenes it was actually her. Her Queen Mermaid character doesn't have much development, but her performance has a lot of simple charm. There are a number of shots showing her interacting with the fauna of the area, including a particularly remarkable shot of her with a large puffer fish, and another showing her feeding an absolute swarm of small fish. I remember seeing "Tiburon" when it first was released and loving the wonderful COLOR photography. Until recently, it has only been available as a bad black and white dub. Finally, the full color version has been released on a DVD called PSYCHOTRONICA VOL 3, paired with another film. This DVD promotes the nude version of the film, where many shots of topless girls (not even wearing mermaid tails!) are inserted into the story. This version also reduces the role of Diane Webber. But the really good news is that the original version with Diane Webber's performance in tact is also included on this disc in the Extras! Subsequently, I read that Webber had passed away the day I ordered the disc. A sad coincidence. Having viewed the color version after living with the bad b&w dub for so long, "Mermaids of Tiburon" is a revelation. It's true the narration is very corny, and the voice-over performance of the lead was stiff, even somewhat amateurish, but color adds an abundance of atmosphere to the underwater scenes, which were even more impressively photographed than I'd remembered. The scenes between Carey and Jose Gonzales-Gonzales sometimes grate, but the Mexican's pet Mina bird adds a nice touch and they followed through with it all the way to the end.Lastly, the score by Richard LaSalle adds immeasurably to the mood of the piece. As would be expected, the strings suggest a siren call in the underwater sequences, but the music for the action sequences are equally effective. "Mermaids of Tiburon" is no classic, and there is an element of amateurishness to the whole affair, but there's something about its magical atmosphere that other mermaid movies don't capture as successfully. It's unlikely that anyone will take the time and care to make a mermaid film that takes place almost completely under water ever again, so in that regard, this film will probably remain a one of a kind. It was great to see it in color again.