TrueJoshNight Truly Dreadful Film

Ava-Grace Willis Story: It's very simple but honestly that is fine.

Fleur Actress is magnificent and exudes a hypnotic screen presence in this affecting drama.

Dana An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

John T. Ryan DRIVE IN MOVIES, Saturday nights and American-International Pictures all contributed to the genesis of this particular genre of teen-age formula comedies. Extreme frugality, quick production schedules and the carefully calculated selection of casts, all made for an assured profit margin.THE CAST MEMBERS, in particular, were a very important commodity in the success of one of these productions. The rosters were a mixed bag of the over the hill and the up and coming. Comic relief was supplied by the likes of Buster Keaton, Buddy Hackett and Don Rickles; but not in the same film. That would only serve to bloat budgets.THE SERIES OF comedies featuring Annette Funicello and Frankie Avalon seemingly being eternally at the Beach,had essayed many a situation; when the idea struck someone that there could be a yet another installment of the Beach Saga. This time it would center on Muscle Beach and members of the Bodybuilding Fraternity.* AS FOR THE 'plot', we can only say that it's paper thin and exists to move the action to the next set-up of gags. So, It rapidly goes from huge, sandy dance ensembles, to surfing, bodybuilding and to the obligatory bad guys. Nothing really "Classic", but at least mildly amusing, albeit old and obvious.AS FOR THE handling of the Bodybuilding and its Practicioners, we must launch a formal protest.WHILE THE ATHLETIC Activity known as Competitive Bodybuilding would make a definite move toward the mainstream with PUMPINHG IRON (1977), in 1964 it was still viewed as being a sort of sub-culture phenomenon. It was even less understood than today, with the Bodybuilders' being categorized as narcissistic, homosexual, muscle bound beach athletes.THE HANDLING OF the participation weight men only added to any misconceptions that the public may have had. Moving mutely on command, the impression is that these strength athletes were intellectually the equivalent of a trained seal or that of a robot.NOTE: Paramount Pictures' BACK TO THE BEACH (Paramount, 1987) neatly parodies this "genre" and even stars Annette & Frankie; as well as a slough of Guest Stars.

moonmonday Let me start by saying that I do love the 'beach party' genre, brief as it was. Honestly though, I prefer the later films, featuring Deborah Walley and Tommy Kirk, and Muscle Beach Party is one that really shows the clumsiness of the earlier entries in the series.Beach Party wasn't that great, but it was a lot better than Muscle Beach Party manages; the first film had a pretty winning group brought together and kept things light, but Muscle inexplicably removes von Zipper and his bikers, substituting musclemen instead who, for a filmsy reason, are enemies to the surfers. Except only a small group of them. You have Don Rickles looking like he doesn't know what he's doing there, Candy Johnson who saves the day with her energetic dancing (but AIP were too cheap to spring for a speaking part, which makes her seem affected), and a Peter Lupus very new to acting. The Del-Tones have a unique part as a band that actually lingers, instead of popping up for a single number and never being seen again, and the lead has a speaking role. Shame they couldn't spring for one for Candy.Then you have Frankie and Annette, playing Frankie and Dee-Dee again. But you have to wonder why Dee-Dee even came to the beach; she's such a wet blanket, there's literally no way anyone would stay with her. The script fails both leads and makes fickle Julie seem like the most compelling and fun member of the cast, which of course is disappointing since she gets treated the worst. Frankie reflects a passion perhaps a bit naive but respectable enough, and Dee-Dee fails to support him, then sings a song about how a boy needs a girl whom she fails to realise is exactly what she isn't. The rest of the gang aren't any better, and whenever they interact with the two, it smacks of 'because the script said so', as none of them are allowed to have even the slightest personality that they showed in most all of the other films.Muscle tries to get serious and ends up depressing, because it does that right when it shouldn't and ends up ruining the lighthearted feel and the jokes that tried to follow the attempts at seriousness. The jokes aren't really all that funny though, especially in comparison to the other films in the series, and overall there are just too many clumsy scenes that go on for far too long and make almost everyone involved look terrible. The only characters who give any joy at all are Candy, with her exuberant (though curiously silent) dancing and Peter Lorre, who is a pleasure to see even in the microscopic cameo he's given.If you really feel you have to see all of the beach party films, this is definitely not where to start. Turn it on and tune out, because nothing amounts to anything -- while that may be true of the other films too, they're at least a fun ride. This one, like the prolonged fight sequence that brings it to its end, simply overstays its welcome and doesn't seem to have an idea that it's lingering awkwardly and in a way that isn't very entertaining.

bkoganbing Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello certainly had one of the rockiest romances ever on screen. It seems in every film someone is either cutting in with one or both of them. Muscle Beach Party is certainly no exception.In fact the whole beach crowd is being crowded by this gang of body builders who've got a gym at the beach that is managed by Don Rickles and his silent partner, reputed to be the strongest man in the world.The beach is even getting more attention as rich Italian princess Luciana Paluzzi and her business manager Buddy Hackett are scoping out the beach for one particular muscle dude, Peter Lupus. Lupus is the self proclaimed Mr. Galaxy and one look at him is enough for any heart to skip a beat. But Luciana skips two beats when she hears Frankie Avalon sing.I think you can see where this one is going especially if you've seen any of the beach films before this. Add to this Morey Amsterdam as a loopy club owner, Dick Turgeon as Paluzzi's attorney who can't close a deal and the mysterious and unbilled Peter Lorre.One thing I do have to say, does anyone really believe that Frankie and his surfers would stand any chance going head to head with the bodybuilders?

Poseidon-3 No one sits down (or should sit down) to a Beach Party film expecting anything high-brow or even challenging. These are the epitome of fluff, corniness and escapism. Title credits play out over a kooky, mildly amusing drawing of various caricatures soaking up the sun and sand then the stars of the film (Avalon and Funicello) and their cronies are shown en route to the beach. Immediately, it's clear how times have changed as the teens are crammed into old-time convertibles with more than a few of the kids hanging onto the sides or backs of the vehicles with nary a seatbelt in sight! Without even stopping off to the bathroom to brush their teeth, the kids set up their patchwork of sleeping bags on the floor of the hacienda (with a couple of hanging blankets separating the girls from the boys!) As the gaggle of kids begins to surf and sun themselves into heaven, a parade of beefy, tan, oily bodybuilders comes out to strut their stuff. When the coach (Rickles) steps on one of the beach bums' towels, a rivalry is kicked off with one of the teens (Ashley) unwillingly providing the demarcation line of the beach with his behind! From a fancy yacht anchored offshore, heiress Paluzzi sets her sights on the most prime slab of body-building beef (Lupus) and enlists her helper (Hackett) to secure him for her. Before she can even recover from an evening in the considerable arms of Lupus, however, she's already moved on to scrawny, but cute Avalon, much to Funicello's dismay. From here, things get increasingly complicated (and silly) as the film builds to an all-out fracas at Amsterdam's night club. Naturally, it all works out in the end with everyone winding up happy. Interspersed with the shenanigans are several musical numbers, some better than others. Various songs come out of people's mouths while their sitting on the wide open beach, yet they sound like they were recorded in the bottom of a steel barrel. Avalon is as tan and boyishly handsome as ever, even if his character can sometimes be a real lout. Funicello has a few amusingly indignant moments as she lays into Paluzzi for stealing her man. Oh, and her hair moves once or twice during the course of the film, too. Paluzzi (at about the 12 minute mark on her 15 minutes of fame) gets to wear a few fun 60's get-ups and tries to inject a little feeling into her man-eating role. Fans of Rickles and Hackett may derive some pleasure out of seeing them in action. Rickles seems to get more opportunities to mug here than Hackett. There's a lot of eye candy for both men and women. Lupus and his muscular friends are often seen in TIGHT satin shorts and Ashley is always cute. Funicello wears a mesh two piece that shows why IL' Walt Disney was nervous to let her be seen in a bikini. No one anywhere, ever, danced like Johnson. She goes bananas in a couple of fringed outfits. The camera lingers occasionally on some healthy, nubile young bodies in motion. These films can provide some real surprises now that a little time has passed. For one thing, everyone assumes that these flicks are squeaky clean, and they are, but Avalon is shown smoking (Smoking!) Also, the lily white cast really tears into Paluzzi with all sorts of slurs towards her Italian background, continuously referring to pasta and pizza where she's concerned.Then there's the ungodly product placement, which many people feel is a more modern hazard of the cinema. Every other frame has someone drinking or standing next to Dr. Pepper! As for the music, Wonder does an admirable job in his first film appearance, but everything that comes out of Dale's mouth is worthless. He can't sing and has no charisma at all. Future celebs Nader and Haggarty can be glimpsed in the beach and bodybuilder scenes, respectively. Lorre had intended to appear in the next Beach Party sequel but died before he could do so.