The Slaughterhouse Massacre

2005
2.3| 1h37m| NA| en| More Info
Released: 28 June 2005 Released
Producted By: 4 What Its Worth Inc
Country:
Budget: 0
Revenue: 0
Official Website:
Info

Follow the story of several attractive teenagers as they try to have a fun time in a slaughter house after dark...

Genre

Horror

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Director

Paul Gagné

Production Companies

4 What Its Worth Inc

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The Slaughterhouse Massacre Audience Reviews

Mjeteconer Just perfect...
AshUnow This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.
Zlatica One of the worst ways to make a cult movie is to set out to make a cult movie.
Dana An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.
lsg-59037 It is majorly flawed, I'll admit. But yet I fairly enjoyed watching it... I am not a fan of low-budget horrors, but this is nowhere near the worst. With fine tuning it could have been much better, but felt the essence was there. There is no storyline (what a surprise), but just remember most horrors are re-gurgitated anyway; however there's enough nudity to get through it. To put another way (analogy), it's like buying a scratchcard, winning, but only getting your money back - perhaps you'd feel a bit short changed, but it could be worse...
MBunge The people who made The Slaughterhouse Massacre should be embarrassed. The folks who distributed it should be ashamed. It has a decent amount of female nudity in the first 15 minutes, but there is not another damn thing in the entire production that could be of value or interest to anyone. There are movies that are bad and some that are so bad they're good. Then there are films like this which are so bad they outlast and exhaust any capacity for irony, mockery or amusement. It just freakin' stinks.As you might guess, this story is about a group of teenagers who get massacred in a slaughterhouse. That's all I'm going to say about the plot because in writing that single sentence, I've already wasted more intelligence reviewing this movie than writer/director Paul Gagné used to make it. If an infinite number of monkeys banging away on an infinite number of typewriters will eventually produce the works of William Shakespeare, one monkey and one typewriter could come up with the script for The Slaughterhouse Massacre…but only if that monkey had brain damage from a case of Mad Cow Disease. Then six weeks after that monkey died, you could toss its rotting corpse onto the set and it would have done a better directing job than Gagné. Every single element of this film, except the aforementioned female nudity, is utterly putrid.Here's what Gagné's cinematic bowel movement has to offer.1. The awesome terror generated by hand-held video footage of the backs of people's heads.2. Editing like the outbursts of someone with Tourettes' Syndrome.3. Action scenes staged like something out of that lame haunted house the Rotary Club puts on every Halloween.4. An appearance of The Cone of Silence from the old "Get Smart" TV show.5. CGI that looks like it was created with a Commodore 64.6. Characters who use flashlights even though the lights are on.7. Not one, not two, not three, but an unbelievable 4 origins for the killer.8. The most ridiculous anti-marijuana message since Reefer Madness.9. This crap is set in Texas but the only character with a noticeable accent sounds like he's from Georgia.10. A scene where it literally takes the characters 3 minutes to walk across a 20 foot wide room. I'm not kidding. Nothing happens in the scene, it just takes them 3 minutes to walk across a room.Look, if you want to see some naked chicks, there are plenty of other places where that can be found. If you want to watch a sucky, low-budget slasher flick, there are hundreds of them out there and almost all of them are Citizen Kane compared to The Slaughterhouse Massacre. If you watch this movie, you're a fool. If you like it, you're a moron.
ja_10491 It was basically a rubbish porno. Pathetic excuse for a film. Although Marty Sickle does have some awesome one liners. Rubbish. Not very good. I would not recommend it. Blonde girl was pretty fit. Strange story line. Weird psycho killer man. Marty sickle rules. His victims drule. This is not a poem. This is me writing ten lines so i can give my review of the film. Thankyou for listening. It was basically a rubbish porno. Pathetic excuse for a film. Although Marty Sickle does have some awesome one liners. Rubbish. Not very good. I would not recommend it. Blonde girl was pretty fit. Strange story line. Weird psycho killer man. Marty sickle rules. His victims drule. This is not a poem. This is me writing ten lines so i can give my review of the film. Thankyou for listening.
scottydog_1 this film by far has been the worst one i have watched all year. i have just finished watching it and it was terrible. the special effects were rubbish, the acting was diabolical and the way it was shot was shocking. the only reason why it was an 18 was because of all the scattered breasts at the start of the film. i looked at the case of the film thinking I'm in for a good horror film and then this load of rubbish started to play. me and my friends were watching and laughing at how corny some of the lines. it was utterly predictable you knew who was going to die and who was going to make it. they say never judge a book by its cover, well they were so right with this film, from the case it looked like a good film and then it started to play. do not watch it.