Protraph Lack of good storyline.

Chirphymium It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

Gary The movie's not perfect, but it sticks the landing of its message. It was engaging - thrilling at times - and I personally thought it was a great time.

Fleur Actress is magnificent and exudes a hypnotic screen presence in this affecting drama.

TheLittleSongbird 'Jupiter's Darling' had so much going for it. Who cannot resist a cast with the likes of Esther Williams, Howard Keel, George Sanders and Marge and Gower Champion, and that it was directed by George Sidney, who made a number of great films.It is a shame that 'Jupiter's Darling' wasn't better than it was. By all means, it is not a terrible film and not as bad as its notorious financial flop suggests. It does have many pleasures and the reasons for seeing the film in the first place come off well. This said, all have done much better, despite loving Keel and Sanders to death 'Jupiter's Darling' was seen as someone in the process of watching and reviewing every Esther Williams musical and it is one of my least favourite of hers along with 'Texas Carnival'.Williams certainly isn't one of the problems, in fact she is in her serenely beautiful Amazonian prime and her aquatic skills second to none and the envy of many. Neither is Keel, who is masculine, commanding and charismatic and sings with his usual warm beauty and robust brio, especially in "Never Let the Night Get Away" where he is quite touching. The two click together superbly. Sanders is his usual suave and smooth self, yes even in a role pretty far removed from the types he excelled at (villains and cads), while Richard Haydn is amusing and Marge and Gower Champion are a delight.That's not all though. The highlight is the truly spectacular water ballet in "I Had a Dream", one of Williams' best and most visually stunning water ballets. The chase sequence is also impressive. Marge and Gower Champion have two notable song and dance numbers and do a terrific job with both. "Life of an Elephant", which sees them dancing with painted elephants, is to be seen to be believed, though some may prefer the more energetic and less lengthy "If This Be Slavery".Visually, 'Jupiter's Darling' is the very meaning of lavish, the use of CinemaScope, rich bold colours and inventive use of wide-screen are just exemplary, "I Had a Dream" being the standout in this regard. The costumes and sets are very handsome too.However, the songs and score are only at best serviceable and generally forgettably substandard, the rousing "Hannibal's Victory March" and the touching "Never Let the Night Get Away" being exceptions. The rest have not-easy-to-remember melodies and sometimes very silly lyrics, some like in "Never Trust a Woman" being questionable. Choreographically, "I Had a Dream" and the Champions' numbers impress but the rest lumber and look under-rehearsed.Storytelling is uneven, sometimes it moves quickly and has great energy but other parts are ponderous, and there is a sense that the film was trying to mix too many styles and genres and it never quite came together. Worst of all is the script, which is impossible to take seriously even in moments that are meant to be serious and even when you are taking the film for what it is, if Keel and Sanders really did have the giggles during filming that's hardly surprising. Sidney's direction is competent but uninspired.Overall, difficult to rate but with enough pleasures to make it watchable. 5/10 Bethany Cox

JLRMovieReviews Esther Williams, Howard Keel, and husband-and-wife dancing team Marge and Gower Champion star in this musical about Hannibal. I went into this a little wary, but wanted to see one of Esther's lesser-known films. Granted, it may have earned a somewhat campy and corny reputation, but I found as I got deeper and deeper into it, that I really enjoyed it. What's a little ingenious about it, is that they worked in an Esther Williams swimming interlude in a dramatic way, as she is being chased. And, the great supporting cast of George Sanders, William Demarest, Douglas Dumbrille and Richard Haydn helps a lot. And, both Howard Keel and Esther are very believable as these mythological characters, she so beautiful and he so big, virile, and commanding. This is the type of film, that one will have the dialogue and especially the songs memorized from watching this over and over, because it's so much of a guilty pleasure. I definitely am going to see this again soon. I was going to give this a seven, given the fact this isn't one of Esther's top successes, but it's just so enjoyable, that I give it an '8.' After all, who cares what movie critics think? Just sit back and enjoy the histrionics of Hannibal and Amytis. By the way, do you think this is accurate?

rdfarnham I had wanted to see this film for a long time since I like Esther Williams, Howard Keel and the Champions. I saw it last night on TCM. What a let down. Not one good, memorable song, no real story and even the dance numbers were uninspired. This could have been a real killer of a movie but it just sort of puttered along on two cylinders, not good enough to be enjoyable but not quite bad enough to say the heck with it and give up. Esther's fantasy swimming number with the living statues is the high point. Howard Keel has no song worthy of his talent and the Champion's dance number with the elephants goes on way too long. The other reviewers have pretty much said it all. The fact that this film is not included in ANY of the Esther Williams DVD collections says a bunch.

crispy_comments Only for fans of the stars or MGM Musicals completists, like me. I've gotta collect them all! Of course this one was made during the decline, as Dore Schary took over the studio and he was *not* a fan of musicals. So, the songs are weak and there's more emphasis on spectacle & action - mixed in with comedy & romance. But the mixture doesn't blend very well. Each genre/character is underdeveloped and unsatisfying. For instance, if you enjoy action/war movies, you may be disappointed with a few chases, brief hand to hand combat...no epic battle, unless you count a little flame-throwing and battering at Rome's gates. Sorry, no bloodshed! (And I know you were expecting it from a movie with "Darling" in the title.)Marge & Gower Champion are kind of wasted. They have one major number where they parade around with trained elephants. It's lame. I mean, they mostly hop around on one foot (yes, the elephants too) and the Champions are definitely limited by their dancing partners. Not their best choreography. Corny bits like mimicking an elephant's trunk, etc.Esther Williams has one memorable underwater ballet with some statues that come to life, but other than that, her swimming abilities are used in more plot-driven ways than usual. Most unsettling is an extended chase sequence where soldiers chase her off a cliff and swim after her, trying to kill her...with bows and arrows...underwater! Is that even possible? It's *definitely* impossible to hold your breath for that long. (Something we don't normally question when Esther's underwater sequences are more lighthearted.) Why combine an air of "realistic" menace with such a fantastical premise? Let our fantasy be...fun! It was actually disturbing to see Esther menaced this way, in her "natural" habitat. She should always be grinning that big toothy grin at the camera and frolicking in the water happily. Don't mess with the natural laws of Esther Williams movie physics!Howard Keel plays his usual charming brute, but maybe a bit too brutal this time, since he's a conquering warrior. Uncomfortable watching him manhandle Esther Williams, hold a knife to her throat, etc. Aaah, love! Marge & Gower also have this slave/master subplot that's pretty offensive. I suppose it's some consolation that she refuses to "be" an elephant...like all the "other" elephants he has trained to *obey* him. Uhh, love? Not much fun to see George Sanders play an ineffectual mama's boy who can't get the girl. He can be suave and charismatic, but not here. I mean, he does what he's meant to...I just don't enjoy seeing him play a buffoonish sort. Would've been better if he was presented as a charmer with wit and intellect to rival Howard Keel's more robust, earthy qualities. A different, but equally attractive choice, to make Esther's decision less obvious. (But I'm not spoiling anything here by revealing Esther & Howard end up together - c'mon, they're the leads, and we know how these movies work!) Sure, Sanders' speech-making ability is acknowledged, but also ridiculed - and Esther doesn't bother to show up for the speech, so we get the message that Sanders is boring... dangit, some women *like* smart, articulate men! They could've created another supporting character who falls for Sanders, proving him a valid love interest who's just not right for *Esther*, since she and Howard are more physical/less intellectual types. Oh well.Wow, I don't remember how any of the songs go. They really *are* forgettable. So, it's easy to see why this movie failed to please the Box-office Gods and led to the fall of the Great MGM Empire! I'd buy it on DVD anyway, especially if that outtake musical number from the Laserdisc (mentioned by a previous reviewer) is included. Curious to see Marge & Gower's deleted dance...it's got to be better than the Elephant Walk Of Shame.