The few authentic inspirations to be found in the movie's hundred and sixty-five roiling minutes involve gigantic science-fiction contrivances.
It barely matters whether this movie is good or bad. Bay is now the sort of filmmaker -- the only one, perhaps -- whose moviemaking goes beyond such binary banality.
In the end, though, this is still a movie about giant robots fighting each other, which is to say it's nearly impossible to take seriously on a narrative level.
Inflated, interminable and incoherent ...
You're either awestruck, dumbstruck or just plain struck in the face.
Long before Optimus Prime hoists his hulking metal frame onto the back of a giant robot dinosaur, wields his mighty sword and rides valiantly away to save the planet once more, Transformers: Age of Extinction plays like a parody ...
Bay has said that this film will kick off a second trilogy of Transformers movies - and I think he's serious. That means there will be (at least) two more of these things. God help us all.
I sincerely enjoyed the Transformer who was literally branded by Oreo.‪
The movie's crammed with useless nuts and bolts, the storytelling equivalent of a mechanic who lifts the hood of your car and says, "That's everything, fix it yourself."